That Hinky Feeling

I am a believer in things like fate, karma, intuition and serendipity. I have personally experienced these things way too many times not to be.

Fate is the development of events beyond our control, something that is destined to happen.

Karma is events that happen after a person's actions that may be considered natural consequences. Many believe that good karma draws positive things, and bad karma or negative energy blocks good things from entering our lives.

Intuition is our inner voice or gut feeling that guides us if we pay attention and let it. It is a feeling that sweeps over us like a shiver, making our spider sense tingle; an immediate understanding of something without the need for conscious reasoning. It is that vibe you get that tells you whether something you are doing is right or wrong. You may get a “hinky” feeling when someone’s actions are questionable, unreliable or suspect.

Serendipity is the occurrence and development of events by chance in a happy or beneficial way.

These feelings have help me make choices and decisions in my life. For a lot of us, there is the misconception that we have no choice in life, but every moment is a choice. There are obviously things in life that we don’t get to choose, like our physical characteristics - height, eye colour, heritage, and relatives.

What is a decision versus a choice?

A decision is a conclusion reached, while a choice is somethings selected from alternatives. We make choices; then, we make decisions (i.e. I chose to go to school in Saskatoon, and I decided to work hard).

We make decisions and choices regarding our friendships and relationships, education, careers, health and finances.

Friendships and Relationships

who we are going to be friends with
romantic partner
children; how many
the boundaries we set
to end a relationship

Education

finish high school
take a gap year
post-secondary options
returning to school later in life

Careers

accept positions
move for a job
leave jobs
change professions
retire

Health Care

eating, exercise and sleep habits
regular doctors visits
follow a natural or a Western medicine approach

Finances

where we spend our money
how much we spend or save
accepting overtime
second job/side hustle

Inner conflict or uncertainty can make decisions challenging. A continuous, unproductive dialogue inside of us says, "I can’t”, “I won’t”, “I don’t”, “I just”, or “I’ll never”. It can feel like we have the weight of the world on our shoulders, and the anxiety that comes with it can be overwhelming; but, once you decide, you feel a weight lifted off you.

We can become comfortable and remain on the same secure path. What factors hold us back from making changes? Was there a career path you wanted to follow but didn’t?

We can be shackled by our fears, meet them head-on or ignore them. These adages come to mind, “what we don’t know can’t hurt us” or “ignorance is bliss”. We aren’t always aware of the heaviness we carry, as those feelings can be with us for years. They become a part of the fibre of our being.

Life is full of storms, bad patches and clear skies. There are, of course, rules and regulations that are there to protect us and others. It is a privilege, despite the challenges, to have the freedom to make choices every day.

We can portray an image that we have hard shell, like armour, that no one can get through. Out of instinct, we try and protect our soft and painful spots. The light can go out of our eyes, and it may take a long time to realize it. You might have a picture or a memory of yourself from a different time in your life and think, “who was that person, where did they go”?

Every choice we make alters the course of our lives. Let your instincts guide you. The end goal is to feel less anxious and be able to revel in the feeling of anticipation a new experience brings.

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